Like many great experiences, this recent adventure started and ended, with me posting on Facebook (FB). It’s how it is these days, we share many poignant and mundane moments with our larger Facebook circle, like little road markers along our larger life journey.
This road sign read, “Full tank of gas. Whistler or Bust, Wanderlust….”
Prior to leaving for Whistler, some internal dialogue, “am I going to be lonely,” “I don’t want to feel alone,” “What is this going to be like?”
I have always loved having time to be alone. I grew up this way, always stealing off to be by myself; sometimes to connect to myself in ways that only happen when you step back away, but sometimes because of fear. I feared my inability to connect with others and so I avoided connection at many junctions in my life, chalking it up to, “I just like to be by myself, it’s how I’m wired.”
At Be Luminous we strive to let everyone know this is a place for their growth, physically, mentally, spiritually. I know the first night I stepped into BL (opening night) I felt held in the warmth of the space and the hearts and minds that dreamt it to be. Community, that night, began to feel safe, free, comforting. I knew Be Luminous was a place for me to step in, to grow, to be challenged, and to strengthen my own wings. And so it is. And so Wanderlust was as well.
From the moment I stepped into the space and energy, I felt connected, content, free, open, and authentic. The festival was amazing. A time and place filled with powerful teachers, friends around every corner, dancing late into the night, music to match the rhythms within not to mentions a random conversation I had with a local in Whistler.
Here was a man who was not a yogi, but signed up for a day of the festival. Through is openness and willingness to share, I was reminded that we all want to go deeper into ourselves, to be deeply connected to the passions in our gut, in communion with people around, and live in the clarity of the vision for our life.
It’s a tall order. I am not going to lie, as much as I desire to live big, bold, and spacious, I struggle too. As a yoga teacher, I believe it is my work to provide practitioners with a space to be your truest, brightest self. Sometimes that means going into the trenches and sometimes it means stepping out of self-deprecation. I also believe it is my job to prod. Prod physically and mentally, from a place of experience and trust.
Life is Urgent. Time stands still for no one. Patience is key, being realistic is important, but squelching the fire in your gut till it is almost non-existent is like starving your most vital self.
Wanderlust tapped on the door of my heart, to which I opened. And flooding in came warmth, love, connection, passion, intention, and a great call, to which I feel bold and committed. It was much like the opening night at Be Luminous, where I felt drawn.
As I continue to teach at Be Luminous, you will see me step up and step out, asking myself to be bigger and to go deeper and, asking the same of you, because we all must. We inspire one another and there is no time to waste. What will you do with this one wild life you have been given? Stay in the security of the trenches or step into the open field. The battle has passed, you are strong now and your soul wants to explore and partake in this vast land, unfettered.
The night I returned from Wanderlust, like an outpouring of an experience that I had not yet fully processed, but for some deeper place within, I had this to share on FB,
“And then, there are those moments in life, that call you to something more, bigger than you now know yourself to be. There is a chasm that you don’t know how you’ll cross, but you know you want what is beckoning, more than, what you already know.
So you shut your eyes, lift one foot, to step into the chasm of the unknown, and in that moment, you pray for the winds of grace to lift you and you pray for wings to soar, not just to get to the other side, but all the space between, desire, and, longing. Take heart.”
I hope to see you all on your mat, because on our mats is where we cultivate the tools we need to stay really present to our lives, physically, mentally, spiritually and this is really the vital work of our lives.
Jen Ernst and I are working to deepen and expand the Intro Series and you can find me teaching Gentle yoga Thursday’s at 4p and Sunday mornings 8 and 9:15.
Keep dreaming, keep playing, keep pausing, and keep going!